This Beautiful Mundane

      Inundated by the fantastical romance that Hallmark has portrayed Christmas to be, it is easy for a single woman, like myself, to be disappointed when another Christmas comes around, finding me still alone. the mistletoe hangs tauntingly over the mantelpiece, happy families and couples on Christmas cards gaze fondly into one another's eyes, and wondering "M aybe next year," begins to be a tiring phrase that repeats itself in my mind. The haunting thought echoes from the unknown, " Will I always be alone?"       In the chill of the morning, rushing out the door to work, trying to see the road from behind frozen windows - There in the chaos, I feel the gentle urging of the Spirit.      What is Christmas really about? We know the answer - do we not? "Jesus is the reason for the season." Is a popular quip amongst American Christian circles.     The incarnation of Christ, coming as a humble infant lying in a manger, is not wh...

     As I drove home late at night along frozen and quiet roads, Classical music played quietly on the radio, and I felt the familiar rush of this romantic’s soul. The feeling of being in a sacred place, a moment scarcely worthy to be known by man. I praised God for His goodness, and His love. The beauty of this earth falls dim compared to the glory and beauty of the King of kings. Can you imagine what it will be like to stand and echo with the angels, “Holy, holy, holy!”?       I have tended to become irritated with myself in the past, frustrated with how quickly I become passionate about something, and then frustrated with the “crash and burn” that undoubtedly follows as my fanciful, rose-colored glasses adjust to the harsh glare of reality.      I may not be the way that I think I “ought” to be, perhaps not so self-composed, not quite so rational or levelheaded - but tonight I simply embraced the ecstasy of emotion that God...

      Since my earliest recollection I have loved children, and dreamed of being a wife and a mother. Another of my earliest recollections is planning and dreaming. At 7 I had drawn on graph paper the blueprint for an orphanage, clinic, school, and soup kitchen. I wanted to be all things to everyone.      I have been able to work with kids throughout my life, helping at home with my siblings, babysitting, and nannying. I have been blessed with exposure to adoption and ministry to the vulnerable since I was very young.      It is intriguing to me looking across the things that God has done in my life so far. Being able to be introduced to the world of HIV+ when I went to Ukraine the first time, seeing the pain in the eyes of the war-weary teens when I went to Ukraine the second time, and then finally getting to know the kids in Bolivia.      I went to Bolivia thinking that I was going to be a hero. I daydreamed o...

I was frustrated the other day, driving home from work, tears in my eyes, asking God “ Why?” Why is my life not going the way that I expected? What is it that you want from me? I know that you have me where you want me, but what do you want from me in this time? In that moment, in the very depths of my soul, I knew the answer - My heart .  The King of the Universe wants my heart? Nothing more? I sighed with relief as the burden of performance was lifted from my shoulders, and then even as I exhaled, the burden fell again.  How can I ever love God as He deserves?             I fail in that every day, my eyes are fixed on myself, and my heart is self absorbed.  Reading in the book of Jeremiah this morning, I trembled a little as I saw the righteous wrath of God being proclaimed against the Israelites. I saw myself in the sins of the Israelites. The Father’...

     I just finished watching a movie about Irena Sendler; a Polish social worker during WWII. She rescued 2,500 Jewish children. Watching the stories of courageous men and women, faced with possible death at every turn, being tortured- and yet withstanding- this, my friends, causes me to tremble.       I  tremble for myself, and for the world today. I know God gives the strength that we need, but, oh brothers and sisters! If we are not strengthening ourselves, and preparing ourselves by memorization of the Word, spending time with Him in prayer, and seeking to follow Him in the little things, how will we ever face anything harder than a flat tire, or a runny nose?  I can  complain of the traffic, getting up early, feeling tired at the end of the day, having a cold, etc, etc. My complaints are so petty compared to the world around us.      I don’t mean to make light of true sorrows and trials in life; God has ord...